Lucas Mangum and I discuss BLOODSUCKERS, conspiracies, and writing on his blog. Check it out!
MICHAEL A. VENTRELLA: I’m pleased to be interviewing author Shane Lindemoen today. Shane is a newer science fiction writer from Minnesota. He started with short literary fiction, earning honorable mention in the 2005 Lorian Hemingway competition with his story “Mount Airy,” and a Glimmer Train nod in 2011 for “Lucretius.” His debut novel ARTIFACT (Boxfire Press, 2013) won the National Independent Publisher Award (Gold, 2014). Shane has had a varied professional life, working as a private investigator, a shoe salesman, and as an Editor of National Affairs for the ezine Secret Laboratory (Maple Hills Press, 2011). He’s also an inactive, licensed Peace Officer for the state of Minnesota, and very nearly finished with his MA in Behavioral Systems Analytics. You can typically find Shane at http://www.shanelindemoen.org trying his darndest to transform his thoughts into tradeable monies.
Shane, what is your writing process? Do you outline heavily or just jump right in, for instance?
SHANE LINDEMOEN: My process is an unmitigated, undifferentiated mess. My workstation is enclosed by a mountain of reference books that I call upon at any given time; my browser has thirty bookmarks open at once, always Wikipedia, always a thesaurus, always Google. My writing has this tendency to take on the language and feel of whoever I’m reading at the moment. Which is beneficial in some ways, but harmful in others: there are many books I can’t read while in the midst of writing something. I once spent two weeks obsessively reading every single Chuck Palahniuk book in existence, and when I sat down to write it was the most horrendous block of text every typed into a word processor.
I have learned to use this weird dynamic to my benefit: if a scene calls for suspense, for example, I’ll use time reading John Little, Stephen King, Joe Hill, Ronald Malfi, or John Everson, which puts me in the right mindset to write suspense. If I have an action scene, I’ll read Matthew Woodring Stover. If it’s time to paint exposition or do some world-building, I’ll read Dan Simmons, Larry Niven, Ian M. Banks, Tolkien. Alex Garland, Amy Hempel, or Cormac McCarthy if I want to say something profound and thoughtful. There’s a whole pantheon of heroes I invoke at any given time when I write. This is why I hesitate reading stuff by new authors, especially when I’m in the throes of writing a new yarn, because if I read something that’s written poorly, I’ll begin to write poorly.
As for the outline. I take that pretty seriously. Before I even drop ink on a draft, I’ll spend time drawing out on paper the various plot threads and where they intersect on the broader timeline. I’ll mark the beginning, the big events, and the end – and while I may not know exactly how things will unfold between those events, I try to make something happen every 1500 words to raise the stakes, create more peril, reveal small amounts of plot, and move things forward. I don’t spend much time on characterization, because I feel the characters flesh themselves out through interacting with each other and responding to things I throw at them. Some say it’s beneficial to have personality types in place before hand, but I get the feel of a character as I go. I simply tag them with something that readers will identify – I give them an image to anchor a voice to, and I try remaining consistent to the way each character responds to things.
VENTRELLA: How much of writing is innate? In other words, do you believe there are just some people who are born storytellers but simply need to learn technique? Or can anyone become a good writer?
LINDEMOEN: I subscribe to the belief that we’re all red-blooded, anatomically-lateral humans capable of accomplishing the same things. Our species hasn’t drifted too far from itself in something like 200,000 years, and yes, there are dimensions of difference specific to us, and yes, many do have certain predeterminations, but excluding functionally demonstrable certainties (disability, mental illness) there is nothing one human can do that another can’t. Writing is a skill – it can be learned, it can be honed, and it can be perfected like any other.
VENTRELLA: Writers are told to “write what you know.” What does this mean to you?
LINDEMOEN: I think it means to either stick to your expertise, or write what you’ve experienced. I think they say this because the yield is more authentic that way. How I’ve interpreted this is simply to know what I’m talking about in terms of research. If I’m writing a space adventure, for example, I’m going to want to know actual spacecraft design and engineering. I’ll learn about antimatter and ion propulsion and how to theoretically create artificial gravity. The goal is to sell the idea of authenticity, and swindle my readers into thinking that I know what I’m talking about. Nothing kicks readers out of perceived immersion more than illogical crap that doesn’t make sense on real terms.
VENTRELLA: Science Fiction doesn’t seem to be selling as much as fantasy these days, including urban fantasy and all the varieties. Why do you think that is?
LINDEMOEN: Reading science fiction is more work. I think it’s a genre that requires its readers to be active observers and engage with the theoretical aspects of it. In other words, reading fantasy is like a ride; reading science fiction is like a homework assignment.
A lot of science in science fiction is actually, functionally possible, which appeals more to the scientific-thinking person – someone who expects a certain amount of reality in what they’re reading. A reader of fantasy doesn’t feel compelled to analyze and measure things against functionally demonstrable laws of nature, because the expectation is that everything – from the nature of the characters, to the nature of the universe itself – is fair game and intended to be taken at face value, no matter how fantastic or absurd. This might sound like I’m making fun of fantasy or something, but that’s not my intention. Fantasy is just a different delivery system of narrative and truth, which I think appeals more to the largest bell of the readership curve. Readers won’t suddenly debate internally about the natural selection of dragons and griffens and trolls, because it isn’t possible in real terms. Readers can accept each thing for what it is and enjoy the ride as passive observers. An interstellar warp drive is possible. Suspended animation is possible. Colonizing other planets is possible. And because of this realness of things, readers of science fiction come into a story with certain expectations.
LINDEMOEN: ARTIFACT is my debut novel, which recently won the 2014 Independent Publishers Book Award for best science fiction. It’s about an ancient alien machine recovered from beneath the surface of Mars by interplanetary miners. When scientists bring it to Earth for study, a physicist activates something inside of it that causes him to inexplicably teleport back and forth between different points in the same timeline. As the separate moments begin to focus on some sort of singularity, the physicist must use what little time he’s given in each place to piece together exactly what happened the moment he invoked the artifact, before it rips reality apart. I’ve been comparing it to equal parts Matrix, Inception, Dark City, Stargate, and Night of the Living dead. I’m not going to lie… it’s pretty out there.
VENTRELLA: What projects are you working on now? What can we expect next from you?
LINDEMOEN: I’m currently working on another science fiction yarn tentatively titled VAGABOND. I haven’t tried soliciting it to publishers or agencies yet, so we could be talking about a slushpile candidate, but it really depends on whether or not I can sucker anyone into buying it. Here’s the setup:
The last evidence of the Endeavor spacecraft became immortalized in a single image captured by the Pinnacle telescope: A teardrop silhouette falling into the shadow of Saturn’s largest moon, moments before losing contact with Earth. The mission and its crew vanished, never to be heard of again. It was considered the last great human push into the fringes of deep space.
Years of silence, speculation, and uncertainty intervened – an uncertainty that stifled any hopes of interstellar travel – and without warning, the IDSI administration received a signal from an outpost in deep space matching the Endeavor’s distress beacon.
Commander Susan Fenroe of the International Deep Space Initiative – a veteran astronaut assigned to her last six-month rotation aboard the science station and galactic telescope, Pinnacle – is beseeched by Command to select a crew of eight, and once again tempt the final darkness. Her mission: travel to the source of the distress beacon, and ascertain the fate of her long lost contemporaries. And when her ship comes in violent contact with something close to where her predecessors disappeared, Fenroe and her crew quickly learn that they must surrender faith to each other and their training if they hope to make it back alive. Because what they find in that distant outpost of human curiosity and ambition is a force of nature that could bring about the end of all things.
A dark fantasy mixed with equal parts survival-horror and hardline science fiction, VAGABOND is one woman’s odyssey into the last of all unknowns. A poignant contemplation of being lost, of shapes moving in the dark, and of the light that keeps them there.
VENTRELLA: What’s your opinion on self-publishing?
LINDEMOEN: I think it’s great. I think it fills an important void in the market. But there’s almost no way other than word-of-mouth for the consumer to sift through the innumerable quantities of crap out there. Many serious self-published authors have the odds stacked against them, because they must somehow find a way to set themselves apart, and there’s really no validation of quality at the onset other than the author’s word. But like in anything, good stuff will always claw itself out of the lesser muck. I know of at least two people who’ve made livable money going the self-pub route after they couldn’t land any traditional contracts.
One author – Adam Nicolai – decided to publish one of his fantasy yarns (CHILDREN OF A BROKEN SKY) exclusively on his own, because he had faith in its success and wanted a larger cut of the profits. Of course, almost every self-pubbed author claims that self-pubbing is a choice, but in his case I actually believe it – Adam is an excellent writer, and his novels are good enough that it’s conceivable publishers would consider picking them up. And then there’s Andy Weir, author of the phenomenally amazing science fiction novel THE MARTIAN, who’s probably going to win the Hugo and the Nebula next year. He couldn’t sell TM at first, and decided to self-publish it. When it sold a couple thousand copies on Kindle, it was quickly picked up by Crown, and hit the New York Times Bestseller list shortly after that. So, yeah – self-pubbing is a good platform for the fierce amateur, but it’s also a thankless, unglorified, disrespected, cut-throat place in which only the serious, learned, passionate, and skilled authors will survive.
VENTRELLA: What sort of advice would you give an un-agented author with a manuscript?
LINDEMOEN: I didn’t have an agent when I made my first professional sale. But I can tell you theoretically what the process should look like. I know that you’re to solicit agencies first, before you try finding a publisher. And if none bite, you have five options. You can 1.) spend the next year refining and perfecting your manuscript, and approach agencies again with a better product, or 2.), start immediately contacting publishers directly. The reason you hit up agencies first is because they won’t normally take you if you’ve been rejected by every single publisher in existence. And most advance-paying publishers don’t accept unsolicited, albeit unagented manuscripts. But say you’ve been rejected by agencies a couple of times, and your manuscript has been refined to the extent that neither you nor your cohorts can find a single reason why it hasn’t been picked up. Well, you really have nothing to lose by pawing the mail slots of various publishing houses. Your manuscript is dead – might as well flame out on the off chance it gets picked up. And if it doesn’t, option 3.) Self-publish. Option 4.) Toss your manuscript in the garbage and start a new one. Option 5.) Enroll in creative writing classes and learn how to write better.
VENTRELLA: What’s the best piece of writing advice you ever got?
LINDEMOEN:A few sage words from one of my favorite authors, Matthew Woodring Stover:
“ ‘Unreliable narrator’ is a tautology. Belief in the reliable narrator is an act of faith intellectually equivalent to belief in the inerrancy of the Bible.”
“If your writing is not a vehicle for truth, it’s just fucking product. Pink slime. Chicken paste.”
“The next time someone advises you, as an aspiring author, to ‘Show, Don’t Tell,’ advise this person in turn to read BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS, and then invite him on my behalf to shut the fuck up for the rest of his life.”
Last one, from Neil Gaiman:
“Whatever it takes to finish things, finish. You will learn more from a glorious failure than you ever will from something you never finished.”
I will be editing an anthology of alternate Sherlock Holmes stories and am looking for submissions.
The idea is to take the iconic (and now public domain) character Sherlock Holmes and twist it in some way: Sherlock as an alien; Sherlock as a woman; Sherlock in the middle ages — let your imagination soar.
I have an agent who is willing to shop this around. In order to interest a major publisher, we’ll need some big names. At this stage, we’re only asking for a story synopsis — that way, you don’t waste time writing a story only to find that we can’t get you a decent pay for it. If a publisher accepts, we will determine the pay and notify you and then you can decide whether to participate.
So I need proposals. Please submit a short synopsis (including the ending) of no more than 400 words, accompanied by your (short) bio and a link to a writing sample. Be sure to mention your previous publishing history.
Deadline is July 12th.
Note: If we cannot interest a major publisher, my current publisher Double Dragon will accept the anthology. With Double Dragon, the only pay will be from royalties (no advances or guaranteed payments).
Please email your submissions or questions.
“They’re all a bunch of bloodsuckers!” I heard someone say.
BLOODSUCKERS: A VAMPIRE RUNS FOR PRESIDENT is now available in paperback, ebook, kindle, and nook. If you like reading my blog, you’ll probably enjoy this.
BLOODSUCKERS is a political thriller — with vampires. Mostly, I loved picturing what it would be like to be a politician who could look someone in the eye and charm them to do their bidding. Imagine the power!
Here’s what it’s about:
Norman Mark is a politician with skeletons in his closet (literally). He’s a liberal Democrat who is constantly attacked by the tea party extremists who say he’s a socialist and an atheist and wasn’t born in America — and a vampire! Everyone laughs at the crazies but it turns out they’re right about all of that.
Disgraced reporter Steven Edwards supports Mark completely. When Mark is shot at a campaign rally, Steve looks to his acquaintance who drops the smoking rifle, smiles, turns into a bat, and flies away — leaving Steve as the prime suspect. He is rescued by the vampire believers (Jon Stewart calls them “Batties”) and he goes into hiding. The only way he can prove his innocence is by proving to the world that vampires actually do exist while constantly on the run from the bloodsuckers and the FBI.
Steve learns that vampires have been controlling things behind the scenes for thousands of years, accumulating wealth and influence. Many vampires don’t like the idea that one of their own is running for President and they’re trying to stop him, worried that he will expose their existence. Others support Mark. Many of them want Steve dead.
Some people have been surprised when I tell them that the candidate is a liberal Democrat, but that’s the dilemma Steve has. Does he continue to support the candidate he believes will be a great President even though he’s a vampire? A President who could charm his enemies into passing progressive legislation that will help all Americans? A President who could meet with foreign enemies and convince them to bring peace to the world? Do the ends justify the means?
The book is as politically accurate as possible, and features real journalists such as Brian Williams, Rachel Maddow, and Stephen Colbert. No, I didn’t get their permission. I hope they get upset at me. I could use the publicity.
And if you’ve read any of my other books or short stories, you know there are many twists, turns and surprises.
I have received some very nice comments from fellow authors who have read the book:
“Ventrella’s quick, bright dialogue punctuates the adventure with dry humor even as he ratchets the tension up towards an ending that might just surprise even the jaded reader. Highly recommended!” – Ryk E. Spoor
“Funny, quick, too smart for its own good.” – Mur Lafferty
“I loved the characters, the political insight and the final revelation!” – Dennis Tafoya
“A delicious blend of mainstream thriller, oddball horror, and biting social commentary.” – Jonathan Maberry
“Action, adventure, laughs and chills.” – Jon McGoran
“Sucks you in from the start and gets its teeth into your imagination.” – Gail Z. Martin
Sometimes bloggers post a donation button so you can show your support for all their hard work. For less than $6 you can download the kindle, nook, or ebook of BLOODSUCKERS. You’ll be supporting my blog and you’ll have fun at the same time.
Grab them with that opening sentence! Astound them with that first page! Don’t let them get away!
New writers hear this advice constantly. It’s a vulture perched on our computer screen, daring us to fail. It sucks up endless hours while we write and rewrite to snatch a reader’s attention.
But how important is it, really?
As with everything, the answer is “it depends.”
As a starting writer, the need to grab a reader earlier is greater than that of an established author. I don’t have to be swept away on the first page by Neil Gaiman or Stephen King, because I know that they will captivate me before long. “But who is this Michael A. Ventrella fellow?” people will ask. If I don’t hook them early on, they won’t continue.
Writing skill in and of itself is not enough. As an editor, I have seen stories that were very well written but nothing happened until page ten. There was character development and background information provided that could have waited until later, when I cared about the character’s situation and it mattered.
So yes. Grab them early. And let us know what we’re in for.
The opening page should ideally establish who the main character is and a setting — Knowing when and where a story takes place helps us get into the story easier. Most importantly, it should contain a question that makes the reader want to turn the page.
As an editor, I am always looking for that grab in the stories I buy. Here, check this opening paragraph from a story by Mike Strauss from the second Fortannis collection, A BARD IN THE HAND:
The heavy wooden door of the only permanent structure in the outskirt town of Padrin’s Hold burst inward without warning and a powerfully built woman dressed in fur skinned from a rare howl bear collapsed onto the hard wooden floor. The frequency with which this occurred was so high that the blood running freely from a large gash in the woman’s leg spilled onto a stain made by many similar injuries across the years. The single resident of the building, a middle-aged elf woman named Endrith, was not only unsurprised, but actually made a few more notations in the thick ledger she was writing in before looking at her guest.
Makes you want to read more, doesn’t it?
Here’s the first page of Mark Mensch’s story “A Matter of Death and Life” from the upcoming Fortannis collection A BARD DAY’S KNIGHT:
“I thought zombies only came out at night,” Nigel said to the milling mass of corpses.
Every story he heard about the undead had always been that they come out of graves at night and roam the darkness looking for the living to feed upon; or at least wait until there was a thick fog to hide within. So he was quite unprepared, when walking through the woods one afternoon, to run into a group of three of the lumbering creatures.
Once the initial shock of seeing them wore off, he figured he wouldn’t have any difficulty with them. After all, they were “lumbering.” What turned out to be difficult for him though was the forest. He was quite adept at moving through a city. Throw drunks, cut purses, fenced off areas and dead-end alleys at him and he could navigate it like a sailor with a magical sextant. But apparently trees, roots, loose dirt and other woodland debris was not the same thing. He found himself stumbling as he ran, cursing at the brambles snagging his clothes and quickly losing his sense of direction.
In addition, the dead had brought friends. Before he knew it, over a dozen of the rotting corpses had him surrounded and his only choice was to climb up a very large tree. Luckily, hand-eye coordination and balance are not in a zombie’s repertoire. Nigel was treed, but safe.
That was three days ago.
Here, one more, by Bernie Mojzes, also from the upcoming A BARD DAY’S NIGHT:
Normally, finding a dead cat is a bad thing, especially when it’s nailed to your front door. But there are worse things.
Being poor, uemployable, and shunned by society, for one.
Being suddenly but discretely wealthy, but still unemployable and shunned by society, for another.
If you’re reading this now, then you probably already know some of my earlier adventures: you’ve either read my own (true, and almost unbiased) accounts, or were at least subjected to the lurid revisionism of the local bards and broadsheets. If you can’t be bothered to do basic research, well, don’t look to me fill you in. I’ve done my part. Suffice to say, my last job earned me enough money that I never needed to work again. Which I suppose is good, if dull, because it’s not like clients were lining up at my door.
Except for the cat. And that didn’t really count as “lining up.” More like just hanging around.
Which is exactly what my own life consisted of at that point. Hanging around and waiting for something to happen to break through the daily monotony of dining (alone) in Ashbury’s finest restaurants and then drinking myself stupid until it was late enough to go to sleep.
Can there be anything worse than boredom?
I examined the cat. It wasn’t terribly large, but showed no signs of being feral; its coat was glossy and well-groomed, a calico, and it wore a worked leather collar with a bell. A large spike had been driven through its chest and into my oak door. Blood stained and matted the fur beneath the wound, and discolored the wood below.
Very curious, and I decided I’d begin my investigation immediately upon recovering from my hangover the following afternoon. In the meantime, it wouldn’t do to have a cat hanging from my door. What would my neighbors say? They already hated and feared me. I would, I decided, put it in a canvas sack and store it in the basement until the morning. I reached for the cat.
And learned exactly what is worse than boredom.
As I carefully tugged the dead cat off the nail, it hissed and spat, and raked a sharp claw across my cheek. I dropped it and jumped back, gracefully catching my heel on a cobblestone, and sprawled on my back.
The last I saw of the dead cat, it was racing into an alley.
There was no way I’d be able to catch it, so I went inside, poured myself a glass of wine, and collapsed on the bed. And I don’t remember much else.
Your goal is to establish a setting and make us want to continue reading. Give us a question that can only be answered by turning the page and continuing on.
And, once more, the final caveat that is always given: There are no rules. It is possible to ignore this advice completely and still have a great opening. If it works, it works.
MICHAEL A. VENTRELLA: John Patrick Kavanagh is a writer, designer and fellow attorney. His current novel CAMDEN’S KNIFE is a rewrite of his previously published SIXERS that was a hardcover best seller (praised by Scott Turow as “Terrific”) and optioned for film by 20th Century Fox.
John, tell us about CAMDEN’S KNIFE!
JOHN PATRICK KAVANAGH: It’s a major renovation of my first novel, SIXERS, that my now-publisher, then-agent Lori Perkins, suggested I undertake. The story is set against the accidental unleashing of a pandemic affliction, Camden-Young’s Disease, which strikes 74% of Caucasians while the other 26% are somehow immune. The massive conglomerate Southern United Enterprises manufactures treatments for CYD which are also used recreationally by the sixers. Dr. Arthur Camden believes there might be a cure formula in a pair of notebooks confiscated from him upon his dismissal from SUE while Trisha Lane, the powerful overseer of the corporation’s Pharmaceutical and Media Divisions, thinks Camden purloined four ounces of a distillate she needs for the creation of an incredibly potent smart pill. Her new admin assistant, our protagonist David Stonetree, gets drafted to be the go-between for a possible swap and faces some difficult decisions.
One of my favorite aspects of the project was the creation of a pair of peripheral web sites that might be portrayed as bonus features. Pinkiefinger.com is a mockup of the home page of a dominant social media site while thecombatartzone.com is an extensive exploration of the assets of the estate of another conquest in Trisha’s trophy case. I can’t tell you how curious I am to see if readers will actually check for the existence of these domains after they’ve seen the names.
VENTRELLA: What is your writing process? Do you outline heavily or just jump right in?
KAVANAGH: I always start with an outline. I think that has something to do with my legal background, as in never ask a question that you don’t already know – or think you know – the answer to. For the book I’m currently working on, the blueprint is eighteen hundred words covering the Prologue, Epilogue and seventeen chapters in between. Two or three additional pages of notes devoted to each of those nineteen segments. A time-of-day flow chart. Numerous sketches of everything from a bird’s-eye view of the exterior of the megaresort down to floor plans of various guest suites to give me a better sense of where characters are situated and how they move. Same for the theater where the Concert is held and especially its stage to help keep track of the performers’ actions. A list of how A relates to B and then to C. Another of details I want to include and potential spots to tuck them in. Single page bios. Lots of cross-referencing.
VENTRELLA: Do you find yourself creating a plot first, a character first, or a setting first? What gets your story idea going?
KAVANAGH: Plot, setting then characters. Especially the antagonist. For me, that’s the compass which points to everything else.
VENTRELLA: What’s the best way to make the antagonist a believable character?
KAVANAGH: Load them up with avarice and the skills necessary to achieve their desired outcomes. Pick any great villain and you’ll most always find greed and cunning heavily in the mix.
VENTRELLA: Writers are told to “write what you know.” What does this mean to you?
KAVANAGH: That sense is certainly important, but it has to include the enjoyment of writing about it … as long as that doesn’t get out of hand.
VENTRELLA: How do you mean?
KAVANAGH: In the sequel to CK I’m currently working on, WEEKEND AT PRISM, there’s an entire chapter devoted to “the biggest rock concert ever held in the history of the Universe,” along with some cutaways to break up the action. It’s already clocking in at close to 24,000 words but it’s so much fun to work on that I keep returning to add more embellishments.
VENTRELLA: What was the most difficult part of the book to write?
KAVANAGH: Assuring that all of the near-future pop culture references are both plausible and believable. For instance, I have Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, Kelly Clarkson, Carrie Underwood and Stefani Germanotta all releasing their third greatest hits albums on the same day. That meets the test, I’d say. But a PGA golfer winning tournaments by reclining on greens and using the handle of his putter like a pool cue? Plausible but bordering on unbelievable, so I struggled with that inclusion until I checked the physics involved which indicated it’d probably pass muster if the shot was less than forty feet.
VENTRELLA: What criticism of your work do you disagree with the most?
KAVANAGH: That my protagonists aren’t strong enough. But I understand they sometimes come off that way because I surround them with characters who are more skilled, more successful and have much higher ball drives.
VENTRELLA: Ball drives?
KAVANAGH: When security people are auditioning pups for possible future employment in contraband discovery, one of the first tests they run is to find out how much the dogs want the ball and how intent they are on keeping it.
VENTRELLA: Who are your favorite authors?
KAVANAGH: Tops is David Wingrove. I’ve read his massive Chung Kuo series two and a half times and just finished the first installment of his Roads To Moscow trilogy, THE EMPIRE OF TIME. Not only another masterpiece, but narrated in … for me, anyway … the extremely difficult first person present tense voice. I read Bill Bryson’s IN A SUNBURNED COUNTRY at least once a year, easily his best despite the anachronisms it’s now saddled with. I also love Jason Gay’s sports coverage in The Wall Street Journal. His mix of humor, insight and commentary is beyond compare.
VENTRELLA: What projects are you working on now? What can we expect next from you?
KAVANAGH: WEEKEND AT PRISM still needs its final five chapters and an Epilogue … I really have to get past that Concert stuff … which should provide the set-up for a third novel set two years later in which many of my characters – especially the High Ball Drivers – join forces, intent on combining their incredible wealth and appurtenant influence to … they’ve got really big plans.
VENTRELLA: With a time machine and a universal translator, who would you invite to your ultimate dinner party?
KAVANAGH: Great question. Seeing the most famous dinner party in history was attended by thirteen guests, I’ll go with that number of seats. I’m thinking a breezy late afternoon on the deck of The Pier House in Key West, catering provided by Geno’s East of Chicago. My wife Susan is a tremendous hostess so I’d bring her along with my best friend Dave Lersch in the event a good cop – bad cop intervention is necessary. That’d leave ten and my dream pairings would be Pablo Picasso and Jasper Johns, Abe Lincoln and Thomas Jefferson, Bill Shakespeare and Paddy Chayefsky. Perhaps Steve Jobs and Thomas Edison? And finally, Wolfgang Mozart and Keith Richards. (laughs) I can hear Richards’ Cockney voice asking, “Wolfie? That middle bit in your Piano Concerto Number Twenty in D Minor? Me and my mate Mick cribbed that for our song Wild Horses.” To which the maestro responds, “No problem, man. I jacked that hook from one of Johnny Bach’s outtakes.”
On the weekend of April 25th, I’ll be a guest at Ravencon, a small but fun convention in Richmond, Virginia. The Guest of Honor this year is Elizabeth Bear. There’s also a costume competition and my artist wife Heidi Hooper is a judge. It’s always a lot of fun to visit my hometown, even if I hardly get to see any of it since I’m in a hotel all weekend.
Anyway, here are the panels where you can find me (and more may be added):
Anthology Don’ts (Friday 4 pm): There are always rules for submitting in anthologies … length, subject matter, etc. Our panelists discuss the common errors they see (or have been guilty of) in anthology submissions. With John Betancourt, Jim Stratton, and Tera Fulbright.
Opening Ceremonies (Friday 7 pm): Guests are introduced to the audience!
Reading (Friday 9 pm): I’ll be reading excerpts from my books and short stories and talking with readers.
The Eye of Argon (Friday midnight): The worst science fiction story ever written gets a reading by our brave panel as they compete to go the longest without tripping over a misspelled word or laughing uncontrollably. Audience members are also encouraged to take a chance. Can you keep a straight face, especially when the panel begins acting out the story? With Philippa Ballantine, Gail Martin, and KT Pinto.
New Releases from Perseid Press (Saturday 11 am): Perseid Press publishes, among other things, the “Heroes in Hell” series. Come and visit Perseid authors and find out about their latest release “Dreamers in Hell.” With Rich Groller.
Young Adult Literature (Saturday 3 pm): What makes a Young Adult novel these days? Is it just the age of the protagonist or is there something else? What books should be considered Young Adult that are not, and which are that shouldn’t be? With Bill Blume, Betty Cross, and Lana Krumwiede.
Allen Wold’s Writing Workshop (Saturday 8 pm): Participants do a small writing exercise, which is then evaluated by the panel, discussing where they have done well and where they can improve. With KT Pinto, Allen Wold, and Darcy Wold.
The Greatest Animated Films of All Time (Saturday 11 pm): The panelists will debate what the greatest animated films are of all time in an attempt to come up with a Top Ten List. Weapons must be checked at the door. With Chris Impink and Patrick Vanner